APPETITE FOR DISCUSSION
Welcome to Appetite for Discussion -- a Guns N' Roses fan forum!

Please feel free to look around the forum as a guest, I hope you will find something of interest. If you want to join the discussions or contribute in other ways then you need to become a member. We especially welcome anyone who wants to share documents for our archive or would be interested in translating or transcribing articles and interviews.

Registering is free and easy.

Cheers!
SoulMonster
APPETITE FOR DISCUSSION
Welcome to Appetite for Discussion -- a Guns N' Roses fan forum!

Please feel free to look around the forum as a guest, I hope you will find something of interest. If you want to join the discussions or contribute in other ways then you need to become a member. We especially welcome anyone who wants to share documents for our archive or would be interested in translating or transcribing articles and interviews.

Registering is free and easy.

Cheers!
SoulMonster

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

2 posters

Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by The WKDY Thu Jan 25, 2024 11:28 am



Last edited by The WKDY on Thu Jan 25, 2024 11:46 am; edited 2 times in total
The WKDY
The WKDY
 
 

Posts : 5
Plectra : 96
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2024-01-25

Soulmonster likes this post

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by Soulmonster Thu Jan 25, 2024 11:35 am

It is set to private so hard to say.
Soulmonster
Soulmonster
Band Lawyer

Admin & Founder
Posts : 15779
Plectra : 76529
Reputation : 831
Join date : 2010-07-06

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by The WKDY Thu Jan 25, 2024 11:38 am

Sorry technically challenged! Should be up in about 10 minutes!
The WKDY
The WKDY
 
 

Posts : 5
Plectra : 96
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2024-01-25

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by The WKDY Thu Jan 25, 2024 11:50 am

Ok got it up! Would love to hear thoughts!
The WKDY
The WKDY
 
 

Posts : 5
Plectra : 96
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2024-01-25

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by Soulmonster Thu Jan 25, 2024 1:54 pm

Here are my thoughts after two listens.

Beautiful lead guitar. I really love the tone. Les Paul?

I don't like the drum beat sound, which is particularly prominent in the intro. Too bossa nova? Some Latin beat, at least.

It is sparse or standard in it's arrangement. I like that. People have a tendency to want to do too much at the same time, crowding the song as a result.

Nice vocal melodies throughout. It is catchy.

I would have preferred some different vocal approach for the chorus, it sort of becomes too similar to the verses, like it all blends into one mass, if you get my meaning. Maybe more pressure on the vocals, a bit more belting, or lift it to a higher octave at some point, if possible? I think some background harmony on parts of the choruses would work.

The vocals are mixed a bit too much in the background, it sounds like someone standing further back in the band. Should be more upfront in the mix. Otherwise I think it is nicely mixed.

I didn't focus on the lyrics so I can't give any input there. But "I've got scars" works for me.

The song structure is fairly straight-forward, the two solos are a plus, especially how it ends on a solo.

Well done, I like it!
Soulmonster
Soulmonster
Band Lawyer

Admin & Founder
Posts : 15779
Plectra : 76529
Reputation : 831
Join date : 2010-07-06

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by The WKDY Fri Jan 26, 2024 12:36 am

Hey hey! Thanks for the compliments and constructive criticism! Very much appreciated! Not sure on the guitar for the second rythm track, the fills and solos lol! I sent what I had, drums, acoustic guitar, vocals, and bass line to a studio guitarist named Pat Valley on sound better.com to do those parts.

I agree the drum track I used could prob be better and I’m shy about my singing voice and I know it’s not very good so I kind of buried it in the mix. I know I could’ve prob wrote a bridge and maybe different chord progressions for the chorus. But I’m just getting started writing songs and recording. This is only the 3rd song I’ve written. So with that in mind I think it’s not bad. But lots of room for improvement going forward.

I’m hoping to get it to GNR one day for them to record it as their own. I’m working on some other songs now. I’ll revisit down the road and make it better when I have time.

Again really appreciate you taking the time to listen and giving feedback! Hope you’re having a great day.
The WKDY
The WKDY
 
 

Posts : 5
Plectra : 96
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2024-01-25

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by Soulmonster Fri Jan 26, 2024 6:31 am

The WKDY wrote:Hey hey! Thanks for the compliments and constructive criticism! Very much appreciated! Not sure on the guitar for the second rythm track, the fills and solos lol! I sent what I had, drums, acoustic guitar, vocals, and bass line to a studio guitarist named Pat Valley on sound better.com to do those parts.

I agree the drum track I used could prob be better and I’m shy about my singing voice and I know it’s not very good so I kind of buried it in the mix. I know I could’ve prob wrote a bridge and maybe different chord progressions for the chorus. But I’m just getting started writing songs and recording. This is only the 3rd song I’ve written. So with that in mind I think it’s not bad. But lots of room for improvement going forward.

I’m hoping to get it to GNR one day for them to record it as their own. I’m working on some other songs now. I’ll revisit down the road and make it better when I have time.

Again really appreciate you taking the time to listen and giving feedback! Hope you’re having a great day.

It's not bad at all! You shouldn't be shy about your singing, you do it well. I think some more confidence in your voice would help, actually, now it sounds slightly timid in a way.

I like that the chord progression is the same throughout verse and chorus, that's entirely fine, but then the song will benefit form the chorus having some more "thump" to make it stand out a bit. One simple way, as I pointed out before, is to get another vocal track onto the chorus, like harmony or just double your voice.

Anyway, great work!
Soulmonster
Soulmonster
Band Lawyer

Admin & Founder
Posts : 15779
Plectra : 76529
Reputation : 831
Join date : 2010-07-06

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by The WKDY Fri Jan 26, 2024 7:51 am

Ohhhhhh ok!! Great suggestion!! I’ll def try that. I’ll send an updated version when I get it right. Thanks for your help and compliments. It’s much appreciated!

Do you make music as well?
The WKDY
The WKDY
 
 

Posts : 5
Plectra : 96
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2024-01-25

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by Soulmonster Fri Jan 26, 2024 7:55 am

The WKDY wrote:Ohhhhhh ok!! Great suggestion!! I’ll def try that. I’ll send an updated version when I get it right. Thanks for your help and compliments. It’s much appreciated!

Do you make music as well?

No, I only play some guitar.
Soulmonster
Soulmonster
Band Lawyer

Admin & Founder
Posts : 15779
Plectra : 76529
Reputation : 831
Join date : 2010-07-06

Back to top Go down

Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think? Empty Re: Wrote an original song for G N' R... whatchoo think?

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum